Missionary Memoir No.2
a personal note from Lindsey's journal entry from February, 2020.
2019 was a horridly overwhelming year and I feel slightly burned out from it. Multiple interns, new expensive school, visas, funding dropped, failed expectations, living in that city house.... that horrid isolation I felt there. I've prayed so hard for a friend and for healing and clarity. Today, I plan to fast for many reasons:
protect and cover my thoughts
for my soul to be strengthened
to remove the distractions and anxiety that comes with them
for spiritual rest and clarity
to see and feel my specific role here ( so many needs around me)
for endurance and perseverance.
I need to remember how God sees me and loves me. I don't have my boldness that I used to have. I feel lost and unsupported...
*Ephesians 2:10* is what I will focus on.
I am His own masterwork, a work of art, spiritually transformed, renewed, and ready to be used for good works... Which God set paths beforehand, preparing the way.
Today is day 2 of my fast. I do feel lighter and that I have clearer vision. But I feel the need to continue in my fast. I feel stronger as I have heavily relied on the Holy Spirit. I still need my thoughts protected and my heart to be lifted. We read Galations 5:16-25 last night and I pray we each walk by the spirit and allow His guidance in our lives.
looking at this coconut I took a picture of in our front yard, was a gentle reminder that we will sit in a dark place prior to growing into the form that we are designed to be. But the light of the Lord never stops shining upon us.